baby update: who needs to poop? not me

and now, what you've all been waiting for

monthage: 2

poundage: 10lb- what what! still not the chunker that we want but he's getting there- he's officially outgrown his first outfit, which was tragic bc it was my favorite one. dark blue really is his color...

how landon is sleeping: he's only waking up once during the night which is pretty nice but he's usually up for a while when he does. a HUGE improvement from waking up 3-4x. i've tried to get him on a routine...which is kinda working.

how he is pooping: he isn't - which has caused many to be all sorts of concerned but this is quite normal for breastfed babies. but still, i'm attacking his poor little bum with a thermometer to help ease the poor guy's suffering. and my suffering of his noxious fumes that emerge from that cute little behind [if it wasn't too inappropriate embarrassing for his future dates, i would take a pic of his cute little behind- because believe me, it's the cutest butt since justins...and that says a lot].
update: after 12 days he finally went after 2 doctors apt and one nurse's call and a lot of crazy, over-worried grandparents - nothing work except for gerber's apple-prune juice. ruined one of his favorite blankets, a cute outfit, and made us late for our ward xmas party. but i've never been more happy to see feces in my life.

lowlight of the month: landon's 2 month checkup- he had to get his shots and man, what a doozer. actually he did pretty well right up to them which was a nice change but then he got his shots and he was mmmmaaadddd. but then he pleasantly fell asleep- and was sleepy the rest of the night. only time will tell how he reacts in the morning. oh and i've started working part-time- so hard to not be with him all day.

zonked out from the tylenol & shots

highlight of the month: he is TALKING! okay....that might be a little premature but he is coo-ing and it's just the sweetest thing in the world. just makes my heart melt- it's seriously the cutest sound in the world.

oh did i mention he finally got his baby blessing? my bff8 kitty-cait came into town for the o-cassion so i got to meet her beautiful little babe. we waited until my whole fam could come down [except nate & his clan had to stay back in ut--which turned out to be a blessing in disguise] for tday so i got a buttload of zobrist-crazy for a while. the blessing was just amazing- we had to do it in the bishops office and landon only cried a little during the whole prayer. it was actually kind of a somber experience- we found out my gma died only a few minutes before we left for prayer so we were all a wreck that day.  but it was still a special day.

"wow- you'd think all of mom would taste
the same but this DEF does not taste like
lunch"

how his constant screaming is doing: his colic is actually finally letting up- thank heavens because my friend told me sometimes colic can last MONTHS not WEEKS- he is getting more pleasant and having more time where he'll just sit and play- before he'd have a good 20 min after he ate then constantly crying/whimpering/holding/attention until the next feeding. now he will go about 30 min or so and will calm down quicker. or maybe we're just getting better at the whole parenting thing. tip: the sound of a hairdryer [or any appliance that is loud] is like a godsend.

the only upside to crying is a) i've grown immune so when it's time to furberize him, i will be on top of things and b) it's just plain adorable when he's screaming for so long and a huge booger-ball come to the tip of his nose then zoinks back in when he takes a break--just adorable.

how mommy is doing: have you read my most recent mel's meanderings? that pretty much sums it up. i am seriously worried that most of the time, i am severely scaring my child. when i let him cry while i cook dinner, forget to change his diaper all day [happen on tday-- so much going on i totally forgot. til he soaked through his clothes and got my pjs], or when i let him lay on the ground while i blog[....may or may not be happening even now]. i think most moms feel this but i am so scared i'm doing things wrong and i am somehow harming landon by making mistakes here and there. but as i mentioned, thats why the first one is super spoiler because you scar them.

mom! who the freak is this?!

thing we're both looking forward to: santa- seriously, it's gonna be the best. not that he'd know but we are getting super excited. we decided for xmas we're gonna start a college fund for him. justin and i were both super blessed to have parents that could help us out and we want to be able to do that for landon. starting small now will hopefully make it easier and a habit for the future. oh and i bought him the cutest book about how one wasn't right, two was nice, but three was where it was at- made me cry there in the clearance section at officemax.

what we're learning: how to sleep in a crib [he sleeps best in his car seat and HATES lying flat bc of his acid reflux so it'll be a long process] and how to not be held all the time. he basically considers this the best punishment in the world but mamas gotta pee sometimes

my jiggy gma

my gma hurst passed away sunday- i found right as we were walking out the door to landon's baby blessing [which made that quite tramatic]. sadly i won't be able to make the funeral because of logistics and a colicky baby so this is my sort of memorium for my jiggy gma.

helen was pretty much me but older- and with more gray hairs. my family lovingly like to refer to justin and i as lenoard & helen in 50 years because i'm the coolest and he reigns me in [notice how i didn't use 'rain']. my grandma was many, many things and my mom had an interesting childhood to say the least.

my gparents lived in blanding, ut most of their life - aka the butthole of utah but it had the dollar and star store so things were schamny. i remember when it got its first fast food resturant- subway. i think there was a town parade. oh, and its got a stop light [kinda- it's just a single red flashing one to make sure people stop at the one stop sign]. i remember many a'summers there hanging with my gma. she was an excellent crochetter and would legendarily make quilts for her gkids [theres somewhere around 15...i think]. she even made me one for my graduation- no wedding one but i got her and my gdad's one which is special....and teal/gold. i remember driving with my counsins to montello to see 'the other side of heaven' and making fun of her relief society arms. she was quite the shopper too--well, she loved to shop. no matter where we went, she was always on the prowl. even when my aunt went to starbucks, she had to go and get herself a mug. and man could she wear those jiggy pants well [read: work-out pants].

helen was an amazing woman- she had five great kids, tons of grandkids, served two missions, and even had a turkey named after her- so how much more can you achieve in life? loved that lady and i will miss her.

first meal at home: turkey crescent wreath

wowzers- want to feel like you live in the stone ages? go without internet for a week. basically i was dying...but accomplished so much. well thankfully mr. cox installation man came today so i am back and running. so many posts coming so brace yourself but i have to share this fancy-schmancy dinner i made last night. after having not cooked for days weeks months i feel like the iron chef. heres a great recipe for turkey leftovers and to get in the holiday mood- had it at a recent vt conference.

this was our first meal at our new house and justin was quite surprised i could cook something other then chicken and rice. so was i.

2 cups diced cooked turkey [bet you could use chicken]
1 cup swiss cheese [i used monterrey jack bc i didnt have swiss- i bet any would be delish]
1/2 cup crasins
1/2 cup diced celery
1/2 cup mayo
1/4 cup chopped walnuts
3 Tb parsley
2 Tb honey mustard
1/2 ts pepper
2 tubs of crescent rolls
1 egg white- lightly beaten


combine everything but the egg- roll out the crescent rolls with the widest part of the triangles touching to form a wreath. put the mixture on the inside and roll the small part of the triangle over it- brush the egg white on top. cook at 375 degrees for 20-25 min or until crescent rolls are golden.

enjoy.

if my heart was a house, you'd be home

{i want you all to know i sit here writing this at 5:34am, after having been up for over an hour, having a starring contest with my handsome little man. he is determined to stay up- i am willing him to sleep with the soothing sounds of the hairdryer from my phone. let's hope i win. the only upside to this little showdown is i finally get time to blog}

we never thought this day would come but alas, it has- it has! i feel like peg from target [snl- best. character. ever.], i just want to shout it from the rooftops people

we have a house!
["and it's on sale!"]

you have NO idea how long this has been coming- or how much we've had to go through. buying such a large, expensive, and life-changing thing like that should be fun right? wrong. worst experience ever. right up there with getting a folley balloon to induce labor and having a bazillian wax [and i had both within a week of each other].

we got the housing bug six months into marriage when the irelanders got theirs- steven told us about this sweet program that triples poor people's down payment. free money? who can pass that up? so we started on the house track- taking the [required and pointless] new homeowners class, compiling all our financial docs, filling out paperwork, finding a loan officer, started house hunting---then justin got his internship. so we put off looking for 4 months.

before we even got home from carson we started looking again, by now our loan officer and community partner had changed [required for the program] and we started looking. and looking. and looking. and we put in offers. and offers. and offers. all while our loan officer and community contact changed AGAIN- we put in a total of 8 offers [only to lose out because we had an fha loan and people wanted cash or conventional, even though we'd usually go in 10k higher than asking--we REALLY wanted a house]- ended up getting offer #8 accepted [which happened to be the same house offer #6 was but their original acceptance bottomed out]. total of 5 different loan officers and 4 community contacts- and a total of a year to just FIND a house. so you'd think once we got an offer accepted things would go smoothly? WRONG again.

turns out, getting an offer was the easy part which we'd never guess bc getting a contract accepted was HORRIBLE. at this point, we had to give more paperwork, explain every deposit ever made, give them the same paperwork we'd given them before because they kept losing it. didn't help that our loan officer was a retard but we HAD to use him to get the free $. we had to file extension after extension because things just kept getting in the way and more often then not, someone would do something wrong, like put our ss#s in wrong or our birth dates. you'd think if these people did this for a living they'd be more on top of things? nope. i could go on and on but this whole process of closing took another 2 1/2 months-- so as you can see, nothing has been fun so far.

enough complaining

*but i failed to mention, because of said incompetent people, we only got 10k of the 15k we SHOULD have gotten, only because of our retards. at this point though, we'd rather have 5k less and a house then wait another month

so we have started moving into our house, which really just had to happen because family and friends are coming into town this weekend for landon's blessing and are staying with us. so be prepared tappanas to use dish cloths for towels and sleep on the ground [not really, but i'm leaning on the dramatic side lately]. nothing about our first house has been fun- not the buying and esp not the moving [having a colicky baby, justin finishing his last semester and both of us working--oh and it falling on a holiday weekend--doesn't allow for a quick or easy move in] but it's our HOME.

i can't wait to unpack our long, lost belongings and realize, 'how did i ever get along without my blue flowered purse or pencil skirt [that i no longer fit in] or my flurry clock that purrs [reference?]'- it'll be nice after over a year of being homeless, moving 5 times, and living out of boxes to have a place to call ours.

and to walk around naked-- really it's been just too long. my bits need to breathe.

the year i stop aging

if i've learned anything from tv, it's that this is the best its gonna get- looks wise. which is pretty sad because my stomach is quite floppy at the moment, i wear my pajama pants all-day-every-day and i'm starting to get chinny-chin hairs. everyone ALWAYS says to old people who definitely look old
you don't look a day over 25.

well people- today is my 25th birthday. so....quite the disappointment. remember last year i made a list of 25 things i wanted to do before i turned 25? fail. i managed to almost nothing. seriously- where did my year go?

-become ambidextrous. if not now, when?
-run another 5k
-make a fondant cake
-sew something [i've already got my eye on making justin & i some christmas stockings!]  i made those stockies! and those onsies from my last post
-write a story my blog counts right?
-throw a fabulous party
-go on a fancy vacation to someplace exotic nothing says exotic like sacramento, slc, elko, san diego and genoa right?
-finally learn how to drive stick
-buy a house! SUPPOSED to happen this week...so i'll consider it doneish
-learn the single ladies & thriller dance
-make a garden
-be a better wife & best friend to my baby, lady
-milk a cow
-read 'the lord of the rings' all the way through. without stopping.
-start saving for retirement
-be more kind to strangers. and i  guess to people i know
-stop drinking soda. for good i'm going a week straight! go me!
-relearn how to play the piano. without fear
-finish reading the old testament
-attend the ellen show
-go skinny dipping
-visit ashland, oregon
-go on a girls trip. with my girls
-save up money for the uruguay trip
 -(**it's a secret!**i'll tell you if i actually do it**) well i did it! we were trying to get pregnant and boy did we!

#25- wearing shoes for the first time

so as you can see, year 24 was kind of a failure but some things i'm def working on. like the piano and garden- i'm going to do once we get our house. i'm even getting my own piano! and i'm on 1 samuel in the old testament (i'm going backwards), so about 400 pages left. and i'm planning on throwing a fabulous graduation party for justin---so i'm a work in progress. 


so a birthday would not be complete without a wish- and since i'm 25 i'm asking for 25 wishes to go 
along with my 25 spankings [dirty]


1- i wish landon will learn how to sleep through the night
2- and get over his colic. poor dude screams all. day. long.
3- i wish justin's last semester will be over with and he'll feel confident in his fancy new job
4- i wish i can become a stay at home mom permanently
5- i wish for this tummy flab to go away, along with the last 20 pounds
6- i wish gilmore girls to come back on tv
7- and for rory to end up with jess
8- i wish my dad's dogs will die so they stop peeing on my mom's floor
9- i wish for our house to finally close
10- and for us to be all moved in
11- i wish the spice girls would have another reunion tour
12- and sell their tickets for $25 each
13- i wish my sisters lived closer
14- i wish my best friend to move to las vegas
15- world peace [i'm not ALL selfish....just mostly]
16- i wish the running rebels would go to the final four this year [just for the hubs]
17- i wish they'd start the 30 rock season
18- i wish breaking dawn wasn't split up into 2 parts and were both being released this weekend
19- i wish for my own slurpee machine in my house
20- i wish ellen would come surprise me at my door with a brand new car
21- i wish justin & i could go on a schmancy vacay to uruguay
22- i wish for a pet kitty
23- i wish justin will forget how much work landon has been so he wants a family of 6

getting ready to oink my chocolate mousse last year- which i usually finish by myself

24- i wish all the hair on my body except my head hair would fall out and never need to be shaved again 
25- and most importantly, i wish kim and kris could work things out. tragic.
[26- for good luck- i wish landon would poop. it's been days and his gas is reaching epic proportions. sadly, he's inherited his mother's silent-but-deadly kind and not his dad's loud-but-odorless ones]


happy birth moment to me people- i've got some chocolate mousse, some sloppy kisses and some baby ones coming my way- so it's gonna be a great day. 


postnote: why do we celebrate the baby on birthdays? really, we should celebrate the mothers for letting  their spawn stretch out their vag, giving them ulcers, and using all of their money. so happy birth day mom- i'm #6 [so basically it was a water slide for me at that point]- my mom's most memorable moment from my birth day? she refused to let anyone touch her before she got her drugs.


way to go mom.

i'm so crafty i make people- and onsies

wohhh there people- i'm about to get crafty on you. really, what choice do i have? i am a temporary stay-at-home mom. not that i have any extra time these days but my little pumba likes to be snuggled onto my chest which leaves my actions limited. that, plus landon really needed some church outfits.

[side tangent: not only do girls have the cuter clothing options but they also have alot more options for church clothes. it's pretty hard to find a small church outfit for a boy- i have two but they are ginormous. last week at church, i noticed in mommy row (aka the front row in relief society where all the new moms sit with their chicklens- yes, i'm part of the cool club now) that all their babies (all girls) were wearing darling outfits. landon was in his sleeper- his yellow owl sleeper, which really doesn't complement his shade. i was embarrassed for my lack of mothering skills]

sara's is the one in the bottom right corner - you can tell bc its straight and professional looking

a good family friend sara made me this adorable tie onsie - so going off of that, i made these. i'm not one for patterns or following rules or any kind of input from people [just ask my mom]- i'm more of a sew-off-the-fly kinda gal and it worked out pretty well. who cares if the ties are crooked, off-centered and fraying? not this mama bear.

lameoween & a lesson in nursery rhymes

lameoween was pretty much the worst this year. chalk it up to a baby that doesn't sleep, a husband who works his tookiss off and a mama bear who is so tired she doesn't even blog anymore [the ultimate sacrifice].

either way, we did what we could and filled the days leading up to it with cute outfits such as these.

before we got married, justin and i had planned our first halloween as parents cautiously. we couldn't do any lame run of the mill outfit for our fancy fella. and then came the most brilliant idea ever.

many know the story but few know the ending. hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. the little dog laughed to see such sport and the dish ran away with the spoon.

nice right? totally wrong. why in the world would the spoon choose the dish? they are so wrong for each other. yes, the bowl offered her curved inside edges and depth but what the spoon really needed was someone her own size, someone who knew what it was like to be a utensil and be forced into people's mouth. so the spoon didn't choose the bowl but the fork.

so what happens after the fork runs away with the spoon?

they forked of course.

and while we didn't wear our costume to any party this year or do anything remotely halloweeney, we can always bundle this little number away for next year and sweep the trunk or treat costume contest.

baby update: if you wake up that baby i will stab you

monthage: one!

poundage: 9lbs 2oz [up an ounce from birth- prob bc i'm spiking his milk with caffeine- i don't care what drs say, it's helping HIM grow] and a half an inch taller- oh and my child has a huge noggin, according to his nurse.

the high: my little simba had TWO very good days and nights- it was like heaven. slept well, woke up to eat then went right back to bed, minimal crying, and liked to play- it was heaven. sadly that all ended sunday night- i'm hoping for a repeat though. then last night slept slept for about a 5 hr block - INCREDIBLE! i kept waking up, expecting him to be up but alas, he wanted to give mommy the gift of sleep.

the low: he got his pku [don't ask me what it stands for- the dr just pokes his little foot and squeezes for HOURS to get blood out which is incredibly hard considering he's in the first stages of his transformation so his human blood just lies dormant in his new immortal muscles and is slowly being used up] thingy. oh- and he's got some blocked tear ducts which just breaks my heart but thankfully he doesn't notice. he's just got some majorly crusty and drainy eyes.

how he's sleeping: a tad bit better- landon's got some ferocious colic and gas problems- and by ferocious i mean screaming for the better part of a day. he has gotten better [when he wakes up to eat, he has started to fall back to sleep easier as opposed to staying up and playing for 2 hrs] but still, not enough hours for this mama bear. my moms been MIA for the past 2 weeks too so i'm running on empty most days [she usually takes him while i sleep a bit during the day- i know, i've got the life].

what he loves: his paci- you'd think the world was ending when it falls out. but that's the kicker, he'll open his mouth wide and whips his head back and forth faster then willow, thus making the paci fall out. it's a vicious cycle. he also loves staring at his daddy- especially after a big meal. and sticking out his tongue.

what he hates: diaper changes and baths- he despises being naked which goes against everything his mother stands for. hopefully this will change once he run wild and free in my parent's backyard, like all the other zobrist-descended children have done before him. esp the boys- they love peeing off the porch [classy people right? we do live on farm so it's not as obscure as it would be at other's houses]

how mary moo cow is doing: feeling like a cow- isn't this weight supposed to just drip off my bones? well it's not. i'm down 23lbs but i gained like 40 pregnancy pounds and 10 post-birth-control pounds so we've got more work to do. i haven't been cleared yet to exercise [blast you c-section!] but oh believe me, those 50lbs are going to sleep with the fishes.

what mama freaks out about these days: his soft spot. landon likes to go outside so one day while sitting on the porch his spot seemed more indented then normal so i grilled my mom what she had done to him. i freak out about it so much these days- it doesn't help i have nightmares where someone drops him, he gets a pancake head and becomes mentally retarded. this whole mama-bear-worry-wart thing is no joke.

prediction about his future: he's got a real fine chance of being the next tour de france winner - with his lung capacity? piece of cake, piece of pie.

and yes this is my life, but i don't look half as good as kirstie alley. most days i don't get out of my zebra pj bottoms- thank goodness being the sexy beast i am, i can pull them off--- more like pry them off. the dirt/spit-up/goo makes them stick unbelievably well to my bod.

i must say though, being a mom is exhausting work but this little puddin pie has my heart on a string. i've never been more tired/stressed out/bored/busy/crazed out more then i am now but heavens know, this little boy is worth it. i'm the luckiest gal in the world.