Friday, June 20, 2014

say what: landon part I

on my bff8's blog, she does a post called abbyisms and it is hilarious. landon, is not quite as gifted with the comical genius his mother is but he tries. here are a hodge-podge of funny things my little stinker
has said these days.

while getting ready for bed
l: mommy, what a beautiful necklace.
m: thank you, it's a gift from grandma shell.
l: i am going buy you a beautiful ring and necklace and i am going to marry you.
m: but i'm already married to daddy.
l: well i'll buy you another ring and you can marry me too.
{too bad polygamy is no longer practiced in the church. or incestuous relationships}

 while putting on his socks & foot creme - or every single time he has to lay down to get his diaper changed
l: don't put your enormous leg on me!
m: i don't have an enormous leg!
l: yes you do!
m: well YOU have an enormous leg.
l: no, i have a little leg. and your leg is enormous.
{i wouldn't really say enormous- maybe big boned or fluffy around the edges}

while getting everything ready to work out

m: landon, do you want to exercise with me?
l: yes!! let's get the exercise mat! i've got my exercise pants on! and my exercise boobies!

when he first woke up
m:  landon, come snuggle me
l: no!
m: please [insert sad face]
l: [laughs] no!!
m: fine, i won't get you breakfast.
l: i'll get my own breakfast out of the fridge.
m: um.... well i won't give you costco yogurt [gogurt]
l: [sigh] alright. [hugs me]- snuggles all done. where's my yogurt?

we have this conversation several times a dy- at the dinner table, at the gym, in the car- all. the. time.
l: i have a penis and a bum bum and daddy has a penis and bum bum and porter has a penis and bum bum. you just have a bum bum to push your pee pee out of.
m: no, mommy has a vagina.
l: you push pee pee out of your
gina. and i have a bum bum to push daddy poops out. [daddy poops are ginormous poops landon does about 3x a day]

while cleaning my pores out with a biore strip - landon was in the bath
l: what's on your nose mommy? toilet paper? is it a bandaid? what is it mommy??

as we're in the bathroom while he's pooping a particularly large dump
l: watch out mommy!! your hair is going to  blow away!!
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KinderTeach said...

Just wait until he starts telling people his version of what is happening in your house. One of the best parts of my job is hearing the family "secrets" as dictated by a 5 year old

Caitlin said...

Haha. These are hilarious. Particularly the dad poops!What a cute funny little boyl

Kari said...

exercise boobies! Hahahaha

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